My dearest mystery lover,

      It has not escaped my attention that many of you might be wondering where I have been. When I have been. Indeed, what I have been. In truth, the full circumstances of my absence are unclear even to me, owing, I’m sure, to the nature of the entity with which I was embroiled. I’m assured my senses will rally in good time. My spirits, too, are rising. Buoyed both by memories of our society’s great successes, and several new expeditions looming on the horizon. I feel a chill beginning to dissipate, as the warmth of renewal rises to the fore.  

      Forgive my familiarity, but if you’re reading these very words, then chances are our paths have crossed before. Maybe it was in Cairo, or perhaps on a deserted archipelago? Might it have been in the aftermath of a terrible theater fire, or inside the haunted walls of a Victorian manor? If not, allow me to reintroduce myself. I am the Curator. The wizard, so to speak, behind the Mysterious Package Company’s heavy crimson curtain. There was a time when I myself dispatched the confounding crates and Eldridge artifacts to our society's esteemed members. I opened doors to worlds beyond our own. To elsewhere. No matter the occasion, I was as pleased for your good company then, as I am now.

      It is true that over the years the perils and pitfalls of our vocation have swallowed many unsuspecting members of our illustrious society whole, and without trace. Return is possible, however, it often triggers peculiar consequences... Thus it is I who must apologize for any inconvenience caused by the herald of my own timely resurgence. The forthcoming eclipse that will cast the continent into darkness next week is one such echo, however, the rift from which it shall emanate was the only portal available to me. I am quite sure that I alone did not cross the weakened veil, so I encourage diligence in the coming weeks. Increased doppelgänger sightings should certainly be expected, and the detaching of one’s shadow, while not fatal, should be swiftly addressed.  

      It is my sincere hope that this periodical may again, as it once did, bring you some reprieve from the mundane. I present this curation of facts, fiction, and curious conundrums to delight, inform, and instruct. May this dispatch lift your spirit, as it has mine, until our next extraordinary voyage.  

          Your humble servant, once again.


Sep 5, 1847 - Apr 3, 1882

Notorious outlaw of the Wild West, shot in the back of the head by fellow gang memeber Robert Ford for a $10,000 reward in St. Joseph, Missouri. Aged 34


Sep 8, 1157 - Apr 6, 1199 

King of England and crusader, struck in the shoulder by a crossbow bolt during the siege of Châlus-Chabrol. The wound later turned gangrenous. Aged 41


Jul 5, 1810 - Apr 7, 1891

  'The Greatest Showman' was an American circus promoter and elaborate hoaxer. Sucummed to a stroke at his home in Bridgeport, Connecticut. Aged 80


3. Mayan cat responsible for eclipses (6)

7. Darkest part of the moon's shadow during an eclipse (5)

8. Greek Titan who drove the sun chariot (6)

9. high and low (5)

12. Beetle who comes into being (6)

13. Sun devouring serpent (6)

14. beautiful Planets (8,6)

15. Period of time when the sun is completely obscured (8)


1. Halo of sunlight (6)  

2. minutes, maximum length of a total solar eclipse (5)  

4. Jade, inhabits the moon (6)  

5. Greek sun god (6)  

6. X of 10, dark plague (5)  

10. 5 o’clock (6)  

11. Greek lunar goddess (7)  

"The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown."

– H.P. Lovecraft


Dec 22 - Jan 19  

If spilled water touches the ground, recite your name in reverse to deter a naiad infestation.


Jan 20 - Feb 18  

Avoid dropping coins this week, for the ferryman may take them as your obel. It's a one-way trip.


Feb 19 - Mar 20  

Shy away from being the first to arrive, but don't be the last. Conspirators count on your punctuality.


Mar 21 - Apr 19  

No good deed goes unpunished. Be 15% less good this week.


Apr 20 - May 20

No odd numbers after dark, for they call to chaos. Keep it even.


May 21 - Jun 20  

Mirrors are to be avoided Wed thru Fri. If you must reflect, use polished brass.


Jun 21 - Jul 22

The void is calling this week. Let it go to voicemail. Do not return the call.


Jul 23 - Aug 22  

Turning left underground ought to be avoided. If you must, complete a full right turn.


Aug 23 - Sep 22

The next secret shared with you will be fraught with mistruth. The next will be Gospel.


Sep 23 - Oct 22  

Deter remote viewers by sleeping with the name of another beneath your pillow.


Oct 23 - Nov 21

If inclement weather occurs regularly while you are upset or angry, calm the **** down.


Nov 22 - Dec 21

Forces conspire to interrupt your plans. Update your calendar on a day-by-day basis this week.

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