Ahoy, dear friends. I shan't keep you this week, for there is little rest for the wicked.

      Traffic through our vaults continues to flow, and I’m informed that the playful prompts that accompany these communiques are guiding hordes of fresh faces to some of its darkest corners. It’s a delight to share that by way of these modest advertisements, many visitors are for the first time discovering MPC experiences that fill a specifically particular, yet amorphously peculiar hole in

their entertainment schedule. Indeed, we continue to offer our wares to a discerning clientele, and invite those who are curious to join their ranks. Mysteries of the murder variety appear to be the flavor of the month. Rather befitting one has to imagine, given April’s cruel nature. Still, it draws to a close and is almost over. Better to ignore the wasteland just a little longer, and have a little fun instead.

      May beckons!


An open rebellion, a refusal to obey - sounds like mutiny. 235 years ago this week, the Royal Navy saw the most infamous of maritime rebellions: that which occurred aboard the HMS Bounty. Disaffected crewmen led by acting-Lieutenant Fletcher Christian seized control of the ship in the South Pacific Ocean, setting Captain William Bligh and  

18 loyalists adrift in a small boat. The former captain and his companions sailed more than 4000 miles to safety and put the wheels of military justice in motion, while the mutineers aboard the bounty settled on Tahiti and Pitcairn Island. Descendants of the mutineers and their accompanying Tahitians live on Pitcairn into the 21st century.

WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE

23 Apr 1564 - Apr 23, 1616

World's pre-eminent dramatist. 'The Bard' Died of unknown causes within a month of signing his will, which he began by describing himself as being in "perfect health". Aged 52

GINGER ROGERS

Jul 16, 1911 - Apr 25, 1995 

Academy Award winning actor and Broadway thespian, defined a golden-era of film dancing alongside Fred Astaire. Died of natural causes, Aged 83

LUCILLE BALL

Aug 6, 1911 - Apr 26, 1989

Emmy award winning actor, comedian, and in 1962 became the first woman to run a major T.V. studio. She has two stars on the Hollywood walk of fame. Aged 77

DOWN

1. Great _ Reef, World's largest (7)

2. To float without mooring (6)

3. Nasty punishment beneath a ship (8)

6. Hit the coast, become stuck (3,7)

7. Dept of Gov responsible for the fleet (9)

10. One who steers a ship (8)

13. Maritime fleet (4)

ACROSS

4. Ship’s prison (4)

5. Military trial (5,7)

8. Aft-most part of a ship (5)

9. Fate of a convicted mutineer (7)

11. H_S (8)

12. Drop to stop, weigh to go (6)

14. In command (7)

15. Vast body of water (5)

“April is the cruelest month, breeding Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing Memory and desire, stirring Dull roots with spring rain. Winter kept us warm, covering Earth in forgetful snow, feeding A little life with dried tubers.”

– The Waste Land, T. S. Eliot

CAPRICORN 

Dec 22 - Jan 19  

Catch a gorgon's gaze this week. Light petrification could afford you the peace and quiet you need.

AQUARIUS 

Jan 20 - Feb 18 

Loud utterances draw unwanted attention - lower your volume by 50% where possible.

PISCES 

Feb 19 - Mar 20  

Attempts to exit the simulation this week are greatly discouraged. A patch is still updating.

ARIES

Mar 21 - Apr 19  

You will know a crocodile by its tears. You're also much, much too close to the crocodile.

TAURUS

Apr 20 - May 20

Ghost sightings are on the rise. Resolve any unfinished business by the Weekend.

GEMINI 

May 21 - Jun 20  

Disruptive spirits dwell nearby. Command them out during the chiming of a clock.



CANCER 

Jun 21 - Jul 22

Make no attempts at necromancy this week. The rising dead are feeling disobedient.

LEO

Jul 23 - Aug 22  

Cracks in the sidewalk are much, much deeper in the 4th dimension. Step over them.

VIRGO 

Aug 23 - Sep 22

Your light burns bright in the dark forest. Too bright. Conceal your ambition until dawn.

LIBRA

Sep 23 - Oct 22  

Heed the canary in the mine, but beware: Some may feign distress to befuddle others.

SCORPIO

Oct 23 - Nov 21

3 knocks in the night may signal malintent. 4 may be the neighbours cat. Proceed with caution.

SAGITTARIUS

Nov 22 - Dec 21

Protective circles of salt spread under moon light will be less potent this week. Wait till morning.

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